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EP75-Thank you to 2024, 2025, A lot to Come!!!

12/31/2024

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"You want to have fun. You want to go on vacations. You want to do stuff. I get it. Again, by planning, you can hopefully still do those things because you figured out how you're going to help Mom, how you're going to help Dad, how you're going to help Grandparents, how you're going to pay for it, and still have time for a life. When you wait and do things in crisis, it's much harder....."
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Ep74: Medication Mismanagement

12/22/2024

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​Richard Wexler
Morning folks, if you’ve been following along with us, you know we are trying to get more information out to people and we have about 80 plus episodes downloaded at this point. We are very excited, we just released our brand new project Aplan2age.org released it this week. We are literally changing the senior care industry. That site can help you, whether you are planning as an older loved one ages, it will literally show you how to plan, provide the form, etcetera. All the resources are there to also help you if you're already in crisis. So we have a special guest today, I'm going to go ahead and introduce him: Charles Gelman is the CEO and Co-Founder of HiDO Health. He's on a mission to improve millions of patients lives with AI assisted robotics. He has over 15 years of experience in healthcare information technology, informatics and sales, working with Startups and Fortune 500 companies. He's a data scientist with a master's in clinical informatics from UC Davis School of Medicine and has his MBA from West TX A&M University. Are you there, Charles?
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Ep 73: The Family Conversation - Finances

12/10/2024

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"[I] unexpectedly found myself in the role of caregiver...and my dad truly considered money to be a taboo topic. Caregiving can be expensive, both for the person who is providing the care and for the person who is receiving the care. My sister and I were raised to believe that you don't talk about money. It's impolite, so of course he didn't share details about his. "

Richard Wexler
We have a great subject this morning about aging adults talking to their adult children about finances. So why is it important for adult children to talk with their parents about the parents finances?

We have a special guest this morning, Cameron Huddleston. She is an award-winning personal finance journalist and author of "Mom and Dad, We Need to Talk: How to Have Essential Conversations with Your Parents About Their Finances". She was a caregiver for more than 12 years for her mom, who had Alzheimer's, and is currently the Director of Education and content at Careful, the first service bill to organize and protect aging adults daily finances. Cameron, welcome, where am I talking to from? Where are you sitting this morning?
​
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Ep 72: www.aplan2age.org is HERE!!!!!

11/27/2024

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Folks, I'm excited, and I'll tell you why. For 15 plus years, and some of you guys have heard me talk about this, I've wanted something to make this aging journey easier. I tell people all the time it'll never be easy, but you can make it easier. My wife and I didn't do that. We didn't get ahead of it. We didn't do that 4 letter word called "PLAN". We fudged our way through for 14 years for all four parents, with two little kids- a sandwich generation classic.

So we started talking about this, and we've been talking about this with my business partner, Peter Ross, who's the Co-Founder and CEO of Senior Helpers, one of the largest in home care companies in the country. He and I started talking 9-10 months ago now, and we have created it and it's ready for public consumption- 
A Plan to Age. You can find it at www.aplan2age.org. 

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Ep 71: A Conversation with Todd Galde, Buying Residential Property, Later in Life,

11/27/2024

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​Richard Wexler
We have a great guest today, Todd Golde, with Preferred Mortgage Partners, a broker in Northern California. Todd actually grew up in the business as his father began his career in mortgage banking in 1979, when Todd was just 10 years old. Around 2004, Todd took over his dad's business and he has been specializing in home financing ever since. While Todd serves the needs of anyone seeking residential home financing, for the past 10 years he's been helping seasoned homeowners finance their next move- with an emphasis on buying before selling. This enables homeowners to purchase their next home before having to sell their current one. Todd lives in Danville, CA, with his wife of 32 years, and there are three children, ages 24, 21 and 19. Welcome, Todd.

Todd Galde
I am Richard. Thank you so much for that warm introduction and I'm I'm truly honored to be here today. Thank. You.

​Richard Wexler
Well, you're very welcome. So I'm going to start off with an obvious question, what is "buying before selling"?
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Ep 70: Cost of Care

11/19/2024

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Good morning, folks, today I want to have a conversation about that little tiny word cost, the “Cost of Care”, that we've talked about a lot, where are? Two days after a an election, and where are we in in reality? Care is expensive. 

We talk about that all the time. It's not going to get any cheaper. As in-home care companies, and as community care companies have the cost of doing business, all the expenses they have (paying their caregivers, etcetera, etcetera), we're just going to see the cost going up. So whether you want to bring someone in to take care of an older loved one in their home, or whether that older loved one is going to move, based on need, to an assisted living or memory care, it's just going to get more expensive.

Obviously, and some of you may know this, if the Vice President had won, which she obviously did not, but she was talking about utilizing Medicare to help pay for the cost of care. So what does that mean? 

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Ep 69: A Conversation with Eddie Chao

10/29/2024

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Richard Wexler
We have a special guest today, Eddie Chao- he is a results oriented Director of Business Development and an Operations Manager with Amada Senior Care he has over 16 years of experience in leadership and team management. He has a proven track record of success, having ked teams of up to 27 people. He has a logistically minded approach that allows Eddie to make informed decisions and ensure smooth operations. He brings a unique ability to identify new opportunities, and develop partnerships. Eddie, are you there, Sir? I hope you're doing well on this little overcast Tuesday morning.

Eddie Chao
I am thanks for having me on.

Richard Wexler
Ohh thank you. So I know that you kind of have a different background. I would really be curious for our audience to hear more about your background and then how that got you into the senior care industry.
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Ep 68: Living in Crisis

10/24/2024

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Folks, on this episode, I want to talk to you guys about something that's the opposite of plan. Something that happened with my wife, myself, and our two small children when everything changed in our life in the summer of 2005.

So I talk all the time about this four letter word PLAN and really trying to encourage people to plan as older loved ones, and spouses start aging, because at some point, most of us are going to need care. OK, so let's say you don't plan- let's look at my life. And I know we wound up with all four (parents), but let's talk about one. 
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EP 67: Nutrition and Aging

10/18/2024

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Richard Wexler
Good morning folks, we have a special guest this morning, Elaine McGee, MPH, RD, is the author of 25 books, including the Best Selling "Tell Me What to Eat if I Have Diabetes", and the revolutionary book "Food Synergy". In 2020, Elaine was named one of the 10 dieticians making a difference, by today's dietitian magazine, and in 2019 was named one of 11 all-stars, in the diabetes world, by Diabetes Forecast magazine. She developed the performance dining program for Stanford University while serving as their Wellness and Performance Nutritionist. Welcome to our podcast, ma'am. So we have an obviously great subject, nutrition and aging. So I have a question for you: why is healthy aging an important issue for you?
​

Elaine Magee
Well, obviously, as a dietitian, it's always been important, right? 
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To Plan or Not to Plan

10/11/2024

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Good morning. My name is Richard Wexler and this is caring in America. The podcast for Caregivers and Care Recipients. So, folks, what do we want to what are we going to talk about this morning? The title of today's show "To Plan or Not to Plan?" So I talked about that 4 letter word, dirty word, P-L-A-N, a lot... it's something my wife and I didn't do. In all the education I provided over 15 plus years, of the thousands of people that I've stood in front of, unfortunately, over 95 percent have never planned. We were part of that 95%. Why? Why did we not plan? I don't think it's something we really even think about.
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We are the adult children, let's say, we're 40-55. We may have children of our own, based on when we got married, when we adopted children, had children- whatever, they may be of a certain age and we're working. Why? Because we probably have to in order to generate revenue for the family. The spouse, the partner, the other individual, there's activities for the kids (like there were for my kids, whether it's sports, whether it's the chess club, whether it's the chorus dance, whatever it may be), they have homework, you may have a commute to and from work like I did. You're trying to have that quote UN quote normal life like we did. Maybe you try to get away if you can once or more a year. Is that for a weekend? Is that longer? Is that someplace really nice, or someplace near where you live, etcetera. And then all of a sudden, something happens with Mom, Dad, Grandparents. They probably live in a different place than you do. It could be down the street. It could be 3 states away, and yet you love those folks and you think about them, but you're not thinking about them every second. And when you talk to them, maybe you're not getting the total truth as to their health.

They're 75, they're 80, 85, in their 90s. We're living a lot longer. I talk about the fact that 30, 40, 50 years ago the parents would move in with the kids and they may make it to mid 70s and then pass away. But now? With medication, with medicine, so on and so forth, we're living longer. This means there's more time for stuff to happen. But again, we're not thinking about this. We're thinking about our own lives and we're not selfish. We just have a lot going on. And again, like I just said, maybe the parents or grandparents aren't being totally honest about how they're doing health wise. Are they stumbling when they walk? Might they fall? Did they fall? Have they fallen before? What's going on in their lives? Let's say we knew they weren't doing that well. Would we really plan? Or would we just kind of sit back and go well, you know, "when it happens, it won't be that difficult and we'll just manage it." That's coming from the husband, the wife, the partner in the relationship. Well, yeah, four times like I had was crazy, one time is hard enough, but it's normally not that easy. And normally you love your parents, you love your grandparents, so you're not going to just say, "oh, sorry, you fell, mom; Sorry, you're flat on your back in the hospital." No, you're going to get in the car and drive there. You're going to get on a plane and fly there. Whatever the case may be, are you really going to plan? We, as people in this country, don't really understand that when we hear "Mom fell, she broke her hip. She's got to go through surgery and she's 85 years old..." what that actually means. We may think, "Oh, wow. God, I hope she gets through the surgery okay.", but we don't really understand all that is involved. We're not the medical professionals. Then she gets through surgery, and then you're going. "Whoa, what's next?" Well, she may need to go off to skilled nursing or a rehab center. Ok, what's that? And what are they going to do? Well, she's probably going to be there for 3-4 weeks as they work with her from a physical therapy standpoint, because she will go there in a wheelchair and they want to get her on a walker. They want to see that progress over those 3 or 4 weeks and then make the decision of what's next. You're probably thinking, well, she'll just go home. OK. I mean, maybe, if Dad's still there. Maybe dad's passed. Let's say dad's passed and she's by herself and she sold the family home and now she lives in a condo, there's stairs going up to the front door. Maybe she lives in a climate where it snows. I mean, do you kind of see where I'm going? Is she going to be able to navigate that well? Is she going to bounce back and in a month, two months from this broken hip? I broke my femur, I've talked about this, I had a stupid fall off a ladder almost 10 years ago. So I'm 60 ish. I'm not 85. I figured two to three months I'd be fine. It took me almost 8 months to kind of really get back to close to where I was before. So again, the question even if we knew something was about to happen, "Oh, Mom's going to fall tomorrow. She's going to walk out of the grocery store and fall just letting you guys know that's what's going to happen."... Are we going to plan?

I think for us to understand why we need to plan, is why I'm doing this. Why I've done all the education and why a lot of people are out there doing this education: We need to inform people that it's difficult. It's difficult. From many perspectives. Mom could live down the block, but is that still easy? You're going to adjust your life. Your spouse, wife, husband is going to adjust their life, the kid's lives. You're going to go check in. I've worked with people like this, checking in first thing in the morning, getting mom all set for the day, driving 30 minutes to work, coming home, going back to moms place, checking in with Mom, making sure she was OK. First of all, how'd she get lunch? Because she's still trying to hobble around on the walker. And now trying to get her dinner, then going home. You're exhausted. Your kids have homework. They may or may not be complaining about homework, and maybe they had after school sports, maybe they had chorus, whatever it may be. And then tomorrow, guess what? It starts all over again. Oh, by the way do you have to go back to mom's again and help her get ready for bed and so on? It's it's a lot. But you're now caring for that person. And maybe you can or cannot afford to bring someone in the home, whether it's what I call "Mary off the street" that came from the pastor recommending it, or Craig's list, and yes, she's less expensive than getting a professional agency in there, but there's all sorts of things that go along with that as well: what if she can't come? What if what if her car doesn't start? What if she's ill? So on and so forth. Maybe it is a professional agency and how many hours are they there? How much can you afford? Right now it's called "private pay", maybe somewhere in the future it changes and there's governmental help, but right now, there's not. So with the moms, dads, and grandparents that need care right now, it's probably on the adult children.

Maybe at some point that somewhat changes, but it hasn't. And it's on the adult children usually. Whether they are a block away, 3 miles away, 10 miles away, 100 miles away, 3 states away. So think about what I'm saying. Even if someone flew by you, a little birdie whispered in your ear "your mom's going to fall later today at the grocery store. She's going to severely break her hip. I know she's 85. I need you to buckle up for what's coming." What would you do? Or let's say this little birdie flew around right by your ear "six months from now, on October 10th. Mom's going to fall. Your mom's going to fall to grocery store and break her hip. Just wanted to give you some fair warning." What are you going to do?
  • What are you going to do from a planning perspective?
  • Will you plan?
  • Will you actually sit down with your wife, husband, spouse, kids?
  • Talk to your mom? "Mom. Hey. Mom, if something were to happen. What do you want? Where do you want to live?" She's Probably gonna stay right here at home. Oh, OK. Well, we live in a climate where it snows quite a bit in the winter time. We're already, per this example, going to be in October. What are you going to do?
Do you really understand what planning means? Do you really understand? OK, let's throw on one more subject. We've already talked about work. You've got to work. You need to bring money in for the family. And now, six months from now, whatever time frame I gave you, that little birdie said "she's going to fall and break a hip". What are you going to do about work? Are you going to be running over to Mom, like I said first thing in the morning, right after work at night? Is someone else going to come over there midday? How are you going to work out those shifts? Who's going to come over there? How's this all going to work? Oh, and by the way, does Mom have an estate plan? All that stuff that she and Dad acquired, do they want to determine where it's going to go, or do they want the state to determine where it's going to go? Stuff. The condo she owns, the other rental property she owns, bank accounts. Baseball glove, things like that. What? How?

Folks think about this. To plan or not to plan. It is so important. It's something my wife and I really wish we had done long before we got the first call about the first parent. We wish we really had an idea of how we were going to handle this, what was going to happen with jobs and income, who was going to be taken care of the parent, and then three more. How we were going to finance that, what they could finance. Who was going to help us with our kids- they were small, they weren't driving and many of you are in the exact same situation. All I'm asking you is think about it. Think about what you would do if a little birdie told you six months before Mom was going to have a really bad fall, that it was coming. To plan or not to plant. Folks, if you want to get a hold of me. Best way? e-mail [email protected].

​Until we talk again, have yourself. An awesome day.
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  • HOME
  • About
  • Podcast
    • Become a Podcast Guest
    • Blog: Caring in America
  • Resources and Services
    • APlan2Age
    • Elder Care Resource Guide >
      • Guide and Guest Information plus Registration
    • For The Family
    • In the Workplace
    • For The Trusted Advisor
    • For Senior Care Business
    • Resources for Life
  • Contact us